Celebration!

Okay, so you probably heard that on Tuesday night the South Carolina Gamecocks won their second College World Series in two years. My FSU degree makes me generally sympathetic to the ACC, but I'll happily celebrate a Palmetto State victory. 'Course, around La Maison Jaune, there's an even bigger victory: The General Assembly overrode veto number 13, which would have eliminated funding for S.C. Area Health Education Centers. SC AHEC helps to bring young folks into health care careers, recruits health care providers into rural and underserved areas (such as Colleton County), and provides continuing education for medical professionals. AHEC employs many fine citizens, including, most notably in these parts, Lady Di. We're grateful to the General Assembly for helping to foster a better environment for medical providers (and for saving the jobs of quite a few deserving taxpayers!).

Making Mountains Out of, You Know...

I've ranted about squirrels, it's true; however, my antipathy for "tree rats" is nothing compared to the bile I've generated for moles. Gotta get Austin Powers on the job!

Out to Lunch.

I was briefly- very briefly- in Marine Officer Candidates School. Attention to detail, they hollered, could be the difference between life and death. Fortunately, daily life rarely offers such dire consequences for inattention.


Lady Di just spoke in Charleston to a national gathering of Health Administration professors.

Looks like a fair amount of work went into her name tag (and the "It's all about ME" is pretty funny). Sadly, they got her name and degree wrong: The name was accurate a year ago, but not currently, and her degree is a Master of Science, not of Arts (though I think she got an upgrade, she strongly disagrees).


Here's a lovely sentiment, beautifully painted, but... Well, all things are possible on a painted license tag, except spell-check.

Obvious Headline Alert, Part I

As opposed to what? Squid? Peanut butter?

A Guy Walks in to the Clemson Extension Service...

...and says, "I'm just starting a farm. I want to grow eggplants, but it doesn't seem to be working". "Tell me what you've been doing", the Agent requested. "Well", the Farmer said, "I went to the store and bought a dozen eggs. I dug twelve holes about four inches deep, and I buried 'em. I've been watering 'em regular, but so far, nothin'. What am I doin' wrong?", the Farmer asked. The agent pondered it for a minute, stroked his chin and said, "Well, first I'm gonna need a soil sample...".

By the way, this is NOT a Clemson joke. You can use any state's agricultural assistance program just as easily. Anyhow, I thought of that old joke as I savored Lady Di's eggplant parmigiana. Quarter-inch slices of eggplant dipped in an eggwash and breaded with a mixture of seasoned breadcrumbs and fresh-grated Parmesan cheese, sauteed in olive oil, and set in layers with tomato sauce made from tomatoes, garlic, onions, and herbs from the farmer's market in between. Sprinkle some Mozzarella on the top, bake for half an hour, and serve it on a bed of angel hair pasta. Good for what ails ya!

Signs, Chapter 12

I'm not sure I understand what all of the traffic signs mean. They're supposed to warn us of stuff, or tell us what to do, right? The one at left, for example: What, exactly, does it mean? Are they warning mean of something, or telling me what to do? I'm confused.
What am I supposed to do with this one? Do I even want to know?

Stormy.

Last night I was watching the Boston Bruins dismantle the Vancouver Canucks in the game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals, and I noticed a severe thunderstorm warning report banner across the bottom of my t.v. screen. Mother Nature had the decency to wait until after the game before unleasing strong winds and dumping lots of water on the Boro. The water is needed, as the Boro has been quite dry over the past month or so. The wind? Not so much. Anyway, I've posted some weather music in Blues, Country, Classic Rock and Hip-Hop. Surely there's something to like in there, no?

Shoes.

New shoes. Old video (still pretty funny, though you have to endure a comercial).

Try a Little Tenderloin.

We don't eat a lot of pork at the "Maison Jaune", but when we do, it's way good. Lady Di marinated this pork tenderloin in a mix of balsamic vinaigrette, dijon mustard, honey, sea salt and freshly ground pepper. A few minutes on the grill, add some squash with a little feta cheese and some basil from the garden, an ear of sweet Silver Queen corn from the farmer's market, and a nice glass of Pinot Noir (you say pork is the other white meat? Maybe, but this red paired quite nicely, thankyouverymuch), and you're all set. Did I mention that you could cut the tenderloin with a fork?

Pregnant Pause.

This has got to be a really tough month to be in the late stages of, you know, uh... Um, you know, when the stork is about to bring his surprise? Well, I guess it's not really that big a surprise. Anyway, Lady Di and I had popped in to the local unit of a large international super-center to pick up various and sundry items, and we noticed one of our fellow parishioners pushing an empty shopping cart and looking mildly agitated. She also appeared to be very nearly ready for a visit from said stork. The lady-for the purposes of this story, we'll call her Beth. This is convenient, because Beth is, in fact, her name- approach and Diane spoke to her. "Beth", Diane inquired, "What are you doing out and about this, uh, late?". After a few minutes of pleasant conversation, we got the gist of it: the stork is taking his own sweet time, and Beth was hoping that a walkabout would speed up the process. A walk was in order, but walking outside was not an option because it is really, really hot outside these days. This store is large enough for a good walk and, more importantly, it is air-conditioned. The empty shopping cart may well have been merely a prop, though we didn't broach the subject.

R.I.P. Tom McEwen.

My brother reported to me that retired Tampa Tribune sportswriter Tom_McEwen_died. The eulogy that I've linked notes that McEwen wielded considerable influence in the sporting world, and that he was instrumental in bringing professional soccer to Tampa, as well as football and hockey franchises. I remember his column, "The Morning After". I read it all the time in my youth. I remember how he used to write about what his wife had prepared for him for breakfast. He wrote things like, "Along with your freshly squeezed orange juice, and toasted English Muffin, these morsels..." Then he break into his story. I liked the stories too, of course, but it was his listing of what he'd had for breakfast that has stayed with me over the past forty years or so.

William Shakespeare, Franz Kafka, and Emilio Estevez Walk into a Bar...

Lady Di and I saw two of the plays featured at this year's Spoleto Festival: The Cripple of Inishmaan and "The Understudy". The Irish production of "The Cripple of Inishmaan" has gotten rave reviews in performances throughout the U.S. I haven't checked the reviews for "The Understudy", but I can tell you I enjoyed it immensely. Both plays focus on the absurdity and futility of life. You know: the meaning of life is that there is no meaning to life. That sort of stuff. The Understudy does it overtly, as it is centered around a play about Existentialist writer Franz_Kafka. The Cripple of Inishmaan doesn't refer to Existentialist writers, but, well, it's Irish, and absurdity is sort of in their DNA.

That got me thinking about some of my favorite existential quotes through history. Here is a sampling:

"For who knows what is good for a person in life, during the few and meaningless days they pass through like a shadow? Who can tell them what will happen under the sun after they are gone?" Ecclesiastes 6:12 (NIV)

You think that Bible verse might've influenced the World's greatest playwrite?

"Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."

William Shakespeare, "Macbeth" Act 5, scene 5, 19–28

Charlie isn't the only of Martin Sheen's kids that's into absurdity and futility: AndyMan likes to quote Emilio Estevez (who was playing the role of William Bonney in Young Guns II, and has this discussion upon being cornered by folks that meant to kill him): "You remember the stories John use to tell us about the the three chinamen playing Fantan? This guy runs up to them and says, "Hey, the world's coming to an end!" and the first one says, "Well, I best go to the mission and pray," and the second one says, "Well, hell, I'm gonna go and buy me a case of Mezcal and six whores," and the third one says "Well, I'm gonna finish the game." I shall finish the game, Doc."

Today's "Luanne" comic strip has a nice spin on team existentialism:



What's the meaning of life? Douglas Adams told us the answer in "The Life, The Universe, and Everything":



You guys do what you like. As for me? I shall finish the game.

Baffled.

I like birds. Lady Di likes birds. I've had bird feeders. Lady Di has a bird feeder. Squirrels like a lot of the same stuff birds like. Squirrels chase away the nice birds. Squirrels are the enemy. I've fought_this_battle_before. This time we've listened. Moved the bird feeder away from the trees, and bought a little metal wrap, called a baffle, to deter these tree-rats. So far, so good: the squirrels seem sufficiently baffled (and this guy gave me an evil stare). In honor of Spoleto, I've edited the photo to make it more, you know, "artsy".

Odd Man Out.

I was watering the Marigolds the other day, and caught this lone orange and red dude amongst the yellow ones. Reminded me of my daughter. And my mom. And me. Teachers had a tough time knowing what to do with us. Smart enough, but kinda out of step with the rest of the class. Back in the day, my buddy, Dave Okamoto, incorporated the Harry Chapin song "Flowers are Red" into a highschool spirit week skit. It about sums it up, I reckon:

Spoleto.

The Boro's only a hop, skip and a jump from Charleston, SC. Charleston is smack dab in the middle of their annual Spoleto_Festival. Spoleto's a really cool conglomeration of art shows, music and dance performances, and theater presented in a range of prices and degrees of difficulty. Check it out, if you get the chance.

Whatsa Matta You?

You've seen the commercial with the Baby and the Italian tailor. You know the one I'm talking about: the one for the internet trading service. Well, years before internet trading- years before the internet, even- my brother, the Amazing AndyMan, lived that commercial. Like his brother, my brother can be kind of a smart-alec. Mostly, it's not intentional. Mostly. We just sorta see the absurdity in life, and we don't feel the need to keep it to ourselves. Case in point: Andy and the Italian tailor.

Many jobs and a career change ago, Andy bought a nice suit. It was, apparently, a nice enough suit that it came with complementary alterations. Now, we Mathews' are not known for financial acumen, but we not inclined to turn down anything if it's free; consequently, Andy was getting his new suit altered. Andy immediately noticed two things about his new tailor: first; he was a social sort who liked to talk. A lot. Second; he had not been long in Tampa from his native Italy. This was something that the tailor pointed out to Andy, but, because of the tailor's thick accent, he didn't really need to point out. All through the fitting, the dude is all, "No-a. No-a. Eets-a not-a like-a dat inna the old-a country" (sorry my Italian accent is-a not-a so good). Andy is straining not to tease this poor old fellow, being very careful not to mimic the guy. "Oh, really, kind sir? Is that the truth. Well, well". Andy was getting into it, and was patting himself on the back for his incredible restraint. They were getting down the home stretch when the tailor asked with great enthusiasm, "Now Howsa DAT?". Equally enthusiastically, Andy mimicked, "Oh, DATSA nice!". Somehow- and contrary to Andy's fear- the suit was hemmed perfectly, and the pants leg hems were not four inches different from each other.

What's the Big Dill?

At her last trip to the Farmer's Market, Lady Di picked up some zucchini squash, mild red onions, cucumbers, local potatoes, and a bunch of fresh dill. The dill was sort of an impulse buy, but she decided to center a meal around the tangy herb. First there was a cold cucumber and onion salad marinated in sour cream and dill. The entre was grilled steelhead trout with a marinade/sauce of freshly squeezed lemon juice, olive oil and two pressed garlic cloves, and a healthy portion of dill. She grilled the fish in foil, then poured off the marinade and set it aside as a sauce after crisping the fish over direct heat. Potato pancakes (her mother, Leona's, recipe), with grilled zucchini and feta cheese, and a glass of pleasant white table wine round out a delightful meal.